"You are an obsession- you're my obsession..."

I have quite a tendency to be prone to ocd. I have several rituals that I do daily concerning my car keys and my alarm clock, and even washing my hands. What is funny is that the rest of my obsessions are easily adaptable. I have been obsessed with many things in my life, and when I say obsessed, I mean that is all I think about whether I am showering, driving, trying to sleep, trying to eat or work, etc. I wake up in the middle of the night and jot things down about it or plan things about it, or I use my obsession to daydream myself to sleep. I have had obsessions with music(never stopped-ongoing forever), men-whether it's men I know or rock stars or celebrities, Bruce Lee-jit kun do, clothing, shopping(always), collectible barbie dolls,bath and body works, poker, line dancing photography, BLOGGING, astrology, astronomy, my kids(always and forever) and now WORKING OUT and getting healthy. I know that is a GOOD obsession, but there was also a time in my life where I was overweight then too, I became obsessed with fitness/working out then too and looking back at pictures and listening to loved ones, I was almost like anorexic. At that time I took a supplement, rode 17 miles a day on a stationary bike, ate 1/2 a muffin for breakfast, a sm salad for lunch, and for dinner usually a lgr salad. I did all this while on Metabolife-before it was regulated, so escentially I was on speed all the time. I had constant sweating and that refrained me from wearing a lot of light colored clothing. I had constant pit stains, and even resorted to wearing paper towels under my shirts tucked into my bra-that's how fast my metabolism was set! I had a very distorted view of my body. I never felt that I looked good enough, my stomach was practically flat(not all the way-thanx to a c-section)and I was into a size 3 jean! I weighed 118 at my lightest point at that time. What is funny is that I still went out drinking every weekend, sometimes after closing 2x a week too! Do you KNOW how many calories are in 1 beer? And I did not only drink 1!
So anyways- now I am taking vitamins, working out at the gym every day and sometimes at home at night too, I have designed a fitness plan and menu for myself- it consists of 1,000-1,200 calories roughly a day. I am an extremely regimented person by nature, so basically this is very easy for me to adapt to. I have lost 10lbs thus far, but the inches and changes in my body are what is really motivating me more! I have been in such a great mood and so upbeat since I have been exercising. I really have been so unhappy when I looked in the mirror, the person I saw was not the person I felt like I looked like. I guess being depressed for soooo long really took it's toll on me, I gained 55lbs in 5 yrs! All of the media attn on shows like "The Biggest Loser," "Celebrity Fit Club," etc pushed me a little to get back into shape.Also my mom bought me a gorgeous opal/diamond ring she bought in Mexico for me for Christmas. I don't have the heart to tell her my fingers are so fat I cannot even fit the thing!(I am almost there now) My biggest obstacle in life is finding an outlet for unhappiness or depression. Even this weekend, I fought w/my grandma and then my daughter and right away wanted to eat something. It is my greatest fear that after all of this work, AGAIN, I will hit a speed bump in my life and turn to food. My entire family on my mom's side is overweight, and I am constantly worried about my daughters going through what I have gone through in my adult life-the yo-yo years. I have been trying to prepare more nutrionally sound and healthy meals for them, and I have introduced all of us to some new foods. Yes, most of them we all hated, and my 2yr old is basically NOT into trying things or eating much of anything lately! But I am trying.
So- when it comes to the choice of a. blogging or b. sleep after a day of working, driving 2 +hrs,taking care of kids, and working out 2+ hrs-I am choosing option B!!