The Ugly Truth

I wanted to write this series because after my Sept posts about Leith I had several of you ask me why we would break up and say maybe or hopefully we would get back together. I don't know for sure if he has completely changed. What I know of him now-he has. But I really don't know for sure. This is the finale of this series...

He had complete control of me, and starting year 3 into the relationship, I didn't really exist anymore. I didn't hang out with my friends, I didn't really do anything but center my life around Leith. He had the final say in what I did or when. He was cheating on me, I knew it. I cheated back with 1 of his friends, he knew it. We would break up, get back together, break up, ...One time he and I were broken up and he was dating and EX friend of mine. There were times they would be on the phone and I would be right next to him in his room while he tried to get her off the phone. On Valentine's day 1993, 2 weeks after we found out I was pregnant, we went to lunch. He hurried the meal, I thought he had a surprise for me and wanted to get me back to his house.(a ring??) He did want to get me back to his house but only so he could go out with AMY, this girl he asked out!!!!!??????????
We had a HUGE screaming match and fight. I hit him repeatedly and he could do nothing to me because I ws pregnant. He picked me up and threw me into the house, slamming the door after him and screeching his tires.
But that wasn't even the most hurtful of all...
Hattie was a quiet girl from a small town in Ohio that moved to Naples. I worked with her in the summer and became her 1st friend. I introduced her to all of my friends, even though she really didn't fit in she would occassionally hang out with us. I don't know how but one day after knowing her for 3 yrs she and Leith were "hanging out". This was like March 1993. They started a VERY serious relationship VERY quickly. I was kinda out of the picture after the V-day thing-so I really wasn't an obstacle, or was I?? I started dating a boy named Jake that I worked with.(Hattie and I didn't work together anymore)Jake was Italian, gorgeous, funny, smart, and really wrapped up over me. He was not my regular type, he wasn't a skater but was an athlete in hs, he was not into the kind of music I was, but we really clicked. He took me out all the time, paid, called me, respected me, and just treated me better than I had ever been treated. He knew all about Leith and the pregnancy-we had worked together for a while. Things were going great...
Leith found out about Jake and threw a FIT. He called me constantly, tried to get back together promising to give me the family our baby needed, etc etc all while Hattie was still in the picture. He offerred to go to the doctor with me and that's when he wormed his way back into the picture. Little by little I was with Jake less and Leith more, the same with Leith for Hattie. I found out that Hattie was pregant too. Leith forced her to end it, promising he'd stay with her not me. She believed him and after he told her it was over, or was it? I had ened things with Jake completely, he hated me. I thought things were going good with Leith but Hattie would just show up where we were. At first I thought she was a stalker(she was) but later I realized that they still "hung out".This went on and on with stops and starts through my pregnancy and months after the birth of my baby. We started to fight over him, who got to take him to work, who got to pick him up, etc. One night she was outside his house and I flipped. I hid in the bushes with his mother and watched them talking. Something snapped and I just ran and screamed to the car. I punched her in the face and ended up with a chunk of her hair. I took off and Leith started screaming at her. He and I talked, and planned to go to our friend Shane's house the next night. We showed up and there was Hattie...with TWO black eyes-1 from me and 1 from Leith. She still always managed to be there. After my daughter was 5 mo old I ended it with Leith. He didn't care so I didn't either. I didn't talk to him, or see him. He threatened to slice my throat open when I said I was going to take him for child support. I got a restraining order. He and Hattie were free of me. (A little while later is when Shannon moved in with me-see last post) A few months went by and I saw him. We flirted and he told me he wanted me back. He told me Hattie was out of the picture. At this point I had made up my mind I was moving to Ohio. To get away from HIM, the drama with my roommate and her boyfriend(later), my brohter had already moved there and liked it, and to just get away from the insanity that I thought was Naples. We hung out and talked regularly. At this point I knew he really was only seeing me. He moved in with me. Things were pretty good and Leith decided he wanted to move with me. I said ok and we planned it out. My brother came back to help drive a moving truck also. It was about 1 week until we planned on moving and Leith told me Hattie called him at work. She eat lunch with him. He said she was suicidal, kicked out of her house with nowhere to go, and was anorexic. She weighed about 85 pounds. I had no sympathy-I didn't care and I told him he could not talk to her. A few nights later she showed up at our door crying. He asked me if she could sleep on our floor. I said HELL NO!!! He said than they would sleep in his van. That was basically it. She manipulated her way back in, he let her and blew me off. He told me 2 days before we were to leave for Ohio that he wasn't going. I was completely devastated.

This relationship really messed me up. I will always remember what he did to me and how I felt, even if we were only teenagers. Teen years are scary times and even more so now. If you work with kids or are a parent-let them know you are there for them and PAY ATTENTION. They need you! My mom was there for me to a point. Even as close as we are today , I could NEVER tell her the WHOLE story.